Helen

The right package

Communitas Collective, Writing 7 Responses »

Jun 162010

This is a copy of my latest post on the Communitas Collective blog.

When I signed up for broadband TV I thought I chose the cheapest package. Recently, I threatened to cancel because of price increases and that produced an interesting disclosure from the company. I could save $20 a month if I cut back to broadband network channels only.

I wish I’d known that in the first place since I wasn’t even watching the other channels in my package. (If you had my package you probably wouldn’t either)

Connecting and being part of a community are in my dreams. Church provides opportunities for those. It used to be the ‘right package’ because everything in it was important to me.

Now I’m looking for ‘connection and community only’ packages. I don’t have a dream church (our current theme) because all churches include things that wouldn’t be in my dream package.

Ben playing Prokofiev Sonata no. 3 June 11, 2010

General updates, Music 1 Response »

Jun 122010

Ben was invited to play at Angela Wright’s students’ piano recital yesterday evening.

Click image below to watch the video.

Download Prokofiev

WCSE playing Brandenburg no 3, June 6, 2010

General updates, Music No Responses »

Jun 072010

The Windy City String Ensemble’s Spring Concert was yesterday.

Nine members of the WCSE, including Ben and Esther, played Brandenburg Concerto no. 3 by Bach. The second movement cadenza (which begins at around 6:15) was written by Ben.

Click image below to watch the video.

Download Brandenburg

The art of asking questions

Communitas Collective, Writing No Responses »

May 262010

This is a copy of my latest post on the Communitas Collective blog.

The work of art placed in front of me certainly was beautiful. But it wasn’t there just to be admired – I was supposed to eat it. “What is it?” I asked my brother, curious and a little apprehensive.

Questions can be powerful. Sometimes we ask because we want information or reassurance. Faced with exquisitely presented but unfamiliar food on our trip to Japan, I was looking for both.

Sometimes if I ask myself a question it helps me get ‘unstuck’. Like “why is this bothering me so much?”

Questions can also show others we care. When I’m having dental work my dentist asks me from time to time “Are you ok?” That means a lot because it tells me he actually cares whether I’m in pain or not. When we ask other people “Are you ok?” with genuine concern, it gives them permission to share with us what’s really going on.
Sometimes questions cease to be real questions because of how we use them. “How are you?” looks like a question but actually it’s a greeting ritual to which the required response is “Fine. How are you?” Even if we’re not at all fine.

People like being asked questions as long as they aren’t too intrusive. When I’m talking to someone I think it’s fun to look for questions to ask. Perhaps I can pick up on something they already said. Or ask about something I noticed about them. Then – very important – I need to let them answer and listen to what they say. If I rush to grab the ‘conservational floor’ back from them they’ll (correctly) see I’m much more interested in me than them.

It takes effort to ask questions and listen and I often fail at it. Yet when I manage, it pays great relational dividends.