Love is the most excellent way

This is the new, improved, short account of my spiritual experience over the last 21 years.

I became a Christian in a fairly ‘typical’ way at the age of 20. My curiosity was aroused by some Christians I met at college whose involvement in all things Christian was very evident. After talking with them and some careful consideration, I prayed ‘the prayer’ to ask Jesus into my life. The moment of praying was a powerful experience to me and my life did change as I began to get involved in Christian activities and seek the inward transformation Christians believe Jesus/God wants to bring about. I was convinced; I was happy (except that my boyfriend remained atheist); I turned into a committed church-goer, Bible-reader and pray-er.

For the next 16 years I was intentional about seeking out a ‘good Bible-based church’ to belong to, taking opportunities to serve at church and geting involved in small group Bible studies. I was not aware of having any foundation-shaking doubts about my faith during that time.

Then, something happened, or something reached critical mass - I’m not sure which. Instead of applying the strong duct tape of “answers to common questions Christians ask” when I had a question or inkling of doubt, I decided not to. I went further - I began to peel off the 16 years’ worth of duct tape I’d reinforced my faith with. I wanted to see what was underneath that was real.

I told Jesus/God “I need a break from this relationship. It’s too confusing and too complicated for me to handle right now” and stopped praying and reading the Bible for personal guidance.

I took off my “this is the Christian way to understand life, the universe and everything” glasses to see how life, the universe and everything looked without them.

These changes took a while to get used to, but once I had, I liked them. The duct tape and the glasses are still in my drawer and maybe Jesus/God is out there waiting for me to say “let’s give this another try”. But I don’t anticipate going back where I was; I have no compelling reason to.

If that was too concise for you, feel free to read the original, longer version: My Story: The Questions Which Didn’t Have The Right Answer. Or maybe just go to the tenth question which is the most substantive: Is The Bible The Word of God?